So I've been in Montpelier for a couple of weeks. I don't know if any of you have ever been to Montpelier, but it has a population of about 2,000 people, all of whom (it seems) have dyed their hair blonde AND black a la my middle school days. I didn't know people still did that, but they do.
Anyway, started my new job at BLH enterprises. For the life of me I don't know how I got this job, as the interview went something like this:
Me: Hi, sorry I'm late.
My Boss: Can you drive a stick shift?
Me: No, but I can ask Tess to teach me.
My Boss: You have the job.
I am grossly underqualified, but somehow have managed not to kill myself and/or others or damage any property with the tractor. I do, however, have to fully stand up and stamp on the clutch to get anything done, so it's only a matter of time before one of those weird little lurchy things gets me thousands of dollars in the hole and my boss punches me in the face. The only thing that keeps me from being paralyzed with fear is the fact that the boys who I work with who give me SO MUCH CRAP for being scared to run the tractor are not very good at working the tractor either. As in not any better than me. So take that, fish gut covered hoodie guys. Stop putting fish in my best friend's purse, or else (this warning is pretty impotent, but whatever).
Besides learning to drive a tractor, I have also learned that there are places in the U.S. where businesses close earlier than they do in Logan. I tried to go to ALCO at 8 to buy some salsa and I was turned away by a guy vacuuming the halls.
Oh, and I saw a bearded lady at Broulims wearing eyeliner and six earrings up each ear.
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